"Daddy" Issues

Just when I think I am in a place that I don't resent my father- something comes up and makes it hard for me to not have those feelings. Inside of me there is still this little girl that is dying for her fathers attention and love. Knowing that he is in the next state and unknowingly denying me, that is baffling. Without getting into too many details, you would think after living on this earth for that many years you would have a few things figured out about relationships what what makes life full. Maybe the reality that his life is full without my consistent presence is good with him is what hurts. I keep getting to these points in my life where I feel like I need to let him know how I feel, and how I have felt for so many years, and the idea of that is so scary I never go through with it. Who knows if I ever will.